Spain was the major accomplishment for this year. I took four of my U16 boys to join Coach Neil's group from Bethesda, Maryland. It was a great experience. It was fun to experience a different culture, be immersed in another language, and to be surrounded by high caliber coaching. We spent six days in Maryland training, then headed to Madrid to train at the Real Madrid complex for eight more days. I met a lot of people that I think will forever change my life.
I documented daily about that experience on my team blog. It was awesome sharing that experience with those four boys, but on a more personal note, and aside from soccer, I feel like a changed person. There's so much more that I want to experience. Over the last week, it's been difficult trying to adjust back to life here in Cache Valley. Something seems to be missing. It wasn't until today where I think I was able to pin point what it was, as I came across a Dr. Seuss book as I was cleaning. "Oh, the places you'll go!" It was exciting having something to plan for. First this year, it was my half marathon in Moab. I was SO disciplined in my training. Then it was Spain, where I spent a lot of time with the four boys in preparing them, again extremely disciplined. Now I'm thinking... "What's next?" And that's where my sense of feeling lost comes in. I don't know what's next. Of course there's the tournaments, the fall season, but nothing on a personal level. So I pulled out that Dr. Seuss book and began reading. When I got to the page that says...
"And when you're in a Slump,
you're not in for much fun.
Un-slumping yourself
is not easily done."
Those words are so true. It's so hard to get yourself out of a slump and into a routine. And for me, to be disciplined, I need something to work towards. A goal. I just can't figure out what my next goal is.
I have my toughest season ahead of me, as Fall is the most demanding of my time. I'm coaching three teams, pretty much, I have a club to run, and it's College season, where I'll be reffing as well. This year, I have quite a few out of state games. With that much on my plate, it's hard to find time for myself and take care of my body how it should be.
Tomorrow I have a game, and the one thing I love most about playing is I feel like I get my individuality back. I play for me. I play because I love belonging somewhere, and lately, with my team that's the only place I feel that sense of belonging. I hope tomorrow can be my new beginning where I can be disciplined to get myself out of my slump. Step one is to remove negativity from my life. It's so draining mentally and emotionally. Step two is to get my workouts back. When my body feels strong, my mind feels strong, and I'm so much more at peace. Step three is to target a new goal. I need a plan. I need structure. And I want to experience more that life has to offer.
Just my thoughts I wanted to sort out. I hope this next week can bring me some answers and ideas, and something to look forward to.
