Sunday, July 28, 2013


It's been quite a year so far.  I've worked very hard with my club, with my teams, and with my own personal goals.  I'm now into year two with my club, and some things are going better, some things I'm still trying to figure out.  I hosted my second camp, bringing my good buddy "Coach Neil" in to run it.  I started a Kinder Academy, which has gotten better numbers than I had anticipated.  And I recently got back from Spain.

Spain was the major accomplishment for this year.  I took four of my U16 boys to join Coach Neil's group from Bethesda, Maryland.  It was a great experience.  It was fun to experience a different culture, be immersed in another language, and to be surrounded by high caliber coaching.  We spent six days in Maryland training, then headed to Madrid to train at the Real Madrid complex for eight more days.  I met a lot of people that I think will forever change my life.

I documented daily about that experience on my team blog.  It was awesome sharing that experience with those four boys, but on a more personal note, and aside from soccer, I feel like a changed person.  There's so much more that I want to experience.  Over the last week, it's been difficult trying to adjust back to life here in Cache Valley.  Something seems to be missing.  It wasn't until today where I think I was able to pin point what it was, as I came across a Dr. Seuss book as I was cleaning.  "Oh, the places you'll go!"  It was exciting having something to plan for.  First this year, it was my half marathon in Moab.  I was SO disciplined in my training.  Then it was Spain, where I spent a lot of time with the four boys in preparing them, again extremely disciplined.  Now I'm thinking... "What's next?"  And that's where my sense of feeling lost comes in.  I don't know what's next.  Of course there's the tournaments, the fall season, but nothing on a personal level.  So I pulled out that Dr. Seuss book and began reading.  When I got to the page that says...

"And when you're in a Slump,
you're not in for much fun.
Un-slumping yourself
is not easily done."

Those words are so true.  It's so hard to get yourself out of a slump and into a routine.  And for me, to be disciplined, I need something to work towards.  A goal.  I just can't figure out what my next goal is.

I have my toughest season ahead of me, as Fall is the most demanding of my time.  I'm coaching three teams, pretty much, I have a club to run, and it's College season, where I'll be reffing as well.  This year, I have quite a few out of state games.  With that much on my plate, it's hard to find time for myself and take care of my body how it should be.

Tomorrow I have a game, and the one thing I love most about playing is I feel like I get my individuality back.  I play for me.  I play because I love belonging somewhere, and lately, with my team that's the only place I feel that sense of belonging.  I hope tomorrow can be my new beginning where I can be disciplined to get myself out of my slump.  Step one is to remove negativity from my life.  It's so draining mentally and emotionally.  Step two is to get my workouts back.  When my body feels strong, my mind feels strong, and I'm so much more at peace.  Step three is to target a new goal.  I need a plan.  I need structure.  And I want to experience more that life has to offer.

Just my thoughts I wanted to sort out.  I hope this next week can bring me some answers and ideas, and something to look forward to.

Wednesday, January 2, 2013


"Happy New Year! This morning I wanted to encourage you, unlock something inside of you and release something great into your life. I asked God what I should say to all of you reading my facebook this morning, and this is what I got. 

I just want to speak a spirit of confidence and boldness to all the men. I pray that men across this nation would rise up and know their identity, that they would know the strength that they have and they would use it to love, to lead, and to bring about change. I pray that men would lead by example. Even if they didn’t have a man in their life growing up that spoke encouraging words to them, my prayer is that they would be the men in others lives to say 'You are strong, you are courageous, you can do it, you are needed, you are loved, you are one of a kind, people look up to you, Don’t be afraid, you are powerful, You are not alone.' I want to encourage all the dreamers out there who have ever thought to themselves, 'wouldn’t it be awesome if I could do that' I want to say to you that you can! why not? seriously, why not?? Why not you? Someone has to do it so why not you? Why can’t you be the one to create that, build that, be that, write that, save that, own that? You are the only thing holding you back from taking those steps of faith. Despite what your circumstances say I just want to speak life in to you. God has a plan for you. Not to harm you but to prosper you, to give you hope and a future. To those of you who are scared to dream because you think you don’t deserve it I just want to say to you that is a lie that you have been agreeing with for far too long. You have something great in you that the world is waiting for. You don’t need to have been born with good looks and money and fame. You just need to have a determination to be exactly who God created you to be and nothing less. I want to give you all permission today to believe in yourself. I want to give you all permission to dream the dreams that God has placed in your heart. He created you specifically and uniquely for a purpose. Ask Him today what that is. I’m speaking to myself today too. There are still dreams in my heart that I want to see in real life, not just in my mind. There are times when I doubt myself and what God is doing in me and how He is using me. There are times when I need to remind myself that I can do it! Sometimes I need to remind myself that there is something inside me that the world is waiting for, that the world needs and they are not going to get it if I just sit on my butt and coast by or if I stay locked in a place where the fear of failure paralyzes me. I want to be brave. I want to live at my full potential being exactly who God created me to be.
Happy New year everyone. 2013 here we go!"

-Anjelah Johnson

This is the first inspiring thing I read to kick off 2013.  If you don't know who Anjelah Johnson is, she's an amazing comedian who I got to go see perform exactly one month ago in Anaheim with Teresa and Mitch.  Not only did I get to see her show, we managed to get to meet her backstage for a meet and greet thanks to Mitch and his "it can be done" attitude.  Here's the pic.

Her words were just what I needed today.  For the past few days, while coming back from a California Christmas trip, I've been thinking about what's next to come.  2012 was all about opportunities and making the most of every opportunity that presented itself to me.  I traveled a lot, starting off with the "B" course in Florida, Vegas a few times, Denver, and California a few times.  I feel like I accomplished a lot in 2012.  It all came at a price though, as I missed a lot of family time, my own personal wellness time, i.e. working out, and of course I lost a lot of sleep.  I'm proud of all that I've done, though, but I'm also ready to move forward.  I created a belief that it takes a year to get over a bad year, so I'm putting a lot of faith into 2013.  My mantra for this new year is IMPROVE.  I'm determined to not only live by last year's motto by seizing opportunities, but to improve in all that I can.  I want to improve me as a person, including my health, my spirituality, my... zen so to speak.  I want to do all I can and improve my talents, my coaching, my teams, and my club.  And yes, I need to improve my attitude towards life.  My cynical nature tends to flow through my veins, so that's where I'm hoping my "zen" idea can fall into place.  I'm in the process of redecorating my office, turning it into my zen/yoga room.  A room where I can focus and find peace.  The painting is all done, I've taken apart my old desk, and I'm in the process of de-junking everything.  I'm just waiting to get my new desk, I need to hang up all my "framed art," and organize all of my soccer and workout stuff.  It should all be done within the next week.  I'm so excited for this big change.

So that's project #1.  Improve my zen.  As far as what this year has to bring... I'm going to believe that there will still be ups and downs.  I'm going to believe that I'm strong enough to shoulder the weight of the downs.  I'm going to believe that I can and will improve.  I'm going to believe that this is going to be a great year.  Welcome 2013.